As a child, I took my mother’s words at face value. During tough moments, I relied on her honesty and guidance. Questions like, “What is your view on faith?” or “Am I making the right choice in my partner?” often filled my mind. In those crucial times, I found comfort in her truthfulness. However, there were also moments when she offered gentle fabrications—little lies that carried significant weight. It wasn’t until I became a parent myself that I recognized this truth. Now, as I navigate life with a toddler and a new baby on the way, I find myself echoing many of those same comforting lies. Here are five that I cherish:
- “You can absolutely do this on your own.” My mother might not have been entirely confident in my abilities, especially when I first rode my bike without training wheels or faced intimidating social situations. Yet, she always encouraged me to take those leaps of faith, even if her heart was filled with doubt.
- “They’re only unkind because you shine brighter.” The teenage years can be particularly challenging, filled with heartbreak and social cliques. I remember countless evenings spent in tears, sharing my pain with my mom, who would comfort me with the thought that the bullies were merely jealous of my talents and strengths. Whether true or not, those words provided solace and perspective.
- “You look stunning in that outfit.” While my fashion choices might have raised eyebrows—think zebra-striped cowboy hats and camo shorts—my mother’s unwavering belief in my beauty helped shape my self-image. Perhaps she genuinely thought I looked great, or maybe she understood the importance of feeling confident in one’s skin, regardless of societal standards.
- “I will always be proud of you.” In reality, there may have been moments when my decisions caused her concern or disappointment, such as during my college struggles. Nevertheless, her steadfast assurance of pride in me instilled a deep sense of self-belief. Even when I faltered, her support never wavered, and that belief helped me find my footing again.
- “I’ll always be here for you.” As an adult, I recognize that some promises are beyond anyone’s control. However, during my childhood, particularly through challenging transitions like divorce, those reassuring words were a source of stability. While our loved ones may not always be physically present, the lessons they impart remain with us forever.
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In summary, the blend of truth and gentle deception from our parents can create a foundation of resilience and self-worth. These misconceptions often carry profound lessons that shape our lives.