As children, we often yearn to grow up quickly. At 3 years old, the allure of being 5, starting kindergarten, and ruling the playground is captivating. By age 5, the desire morphs into wanting to be 10, with homework, early bedtimes, and sleepovers. At 10, we set our sights on the teenage years, where independence and a driver’s license beckon. Then comes college, where we envision ourselves as future breadwinners and decision-makers.
Graduating leads to marriage, followed by children, pets, and a house—essentially, adulthood. This phase is often regarded as the pinnacle of life, where we believe we will acquire all the answers, master our lives, and tackle the world with newfound power.
Some individuals may indeed feel they have achieved this ideal. You might look in the mirror, hands on your hips, and think, “I am the epitome of adulthood.” Perhaps you are that self-assured professional, mother, or wife who seems to have it all figured out, complete with stylish outfits and punctuality. If that’s you, I encourage you to take a moment and reflect.
However, for many of us, the reality of adulthood is starkly different. Personally, as I crossed the threshold into adulthood, I was struck by a wave of nostalgia. I found myself longing for the carefree days of being 3, with pigtails and pajamas, or 5, riding a Big Wheel without a care in the world. Even my teenage years seemed to shine with a golden hue, when I was blissfully unaware of the complexities of adult life. College, with its focus on learning and personal freedom, called to me as well.
I had initially believed that reaching adulthood would grant me confidence and certainty in decision-making. Yet, at 46, I still find myself grappling with uncertainty. I may technically be an adult, but I often question myself and seek guidance from others before making choices. My husband and I frequently debate our vacation plans until it’s too late to act.
Despite our best efforts, we often succumb to spontaneity, choosing to embark on last-minute road trips, sometimes driving over 1,200 miles on a whim. These adventures might not resemble the idyllic family vacations we imagined, marked by matching outfits and meticulously planned itineraries. The work required for those picture-perfect vacations might leave us feeling dissatisfied.
In those moments of creativity and inspiration, we inadvertently shape our children’s perceptions of adulthood. The life we present to them is one of joy, adventure, and spontaneity, which defies the conventional image of adulthood. This redefinition emphasizes feelings over age, allowing us to embrace our own versions of adulthood.
If you find that your reflection doesn’t reveal the superhero you envisioned, remember that it’s perfectly acceptable to redefine what it means to be an adult. Personally, I’ve learned that adulthood is about embracing who I am. I can dye my hair blue, wear ripped jeans, and enjoy breakfast for dinner, all while nurturing a loving relationship with my family. Ultimately, I can indulge in moments of whimsy, even if that means riding a Big Wheel in pigtails. Regardless of age, this is the life I cherish.
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Summary:
Adulthood is often seen as the ultimate goal in life, filled with expectations of confidence and mastery. However, the reality can be quite different, marked by uncertainty and nostalgia for childhood. Embracing spontaneity and redefining what it means to be an adult can lead to a fulfilling life filled with joy and adventure.