As Eleanor Roosevelt once observed, “Probably the happiest period in life most frequently is in middle age, when the eager passions of youth are cooled, and the infirmities of age not yet begun.” At 40, I find this sentiment to ring true more than ever. I first noticed my first gray hair at 22, so by the time I reached my fourth decade, I felt quite accustomed to the idea of aging. While many of my peers worried about turning 40, I simply scheduled yet another hair coloring appointment. To me, this milestone was just another reason to celebrate life, albeit with a more elaborate cake.
Admittedly, life at 40 is different. Statistics suggest I’ve crossed the halfway point of my life, my hormones are fluctuating, and the days of being whistled at on the street seem to be behind me. Occasionally, I even indulge in wearing comfortable underwear, which has surprisingly become trendy. Yet, every wrinkle and sag tells a story, revealing my strengths, flaws, experiences, and desires. Middle age offers a unique balance between youth and wisdom—a space I cherish. Despite the occasional joint pain that was absent in my 20s, I’ve never felt happier.
With the onset of 40, I’ve gained a newfound confidence. I’m less concerned with others’ opinions and have a clearer understanding of who I am. I know how to flatter my figure and have bid farewell to low-rise jeans, embracing yoga pants instead. I no longer feel the need to apply makeup for mundane errands, and I enjoy a glass of wine without the dread of a hangover. It’s liberating to embrace my guilty pleasures, whether it’s reality TV, lip gloss, or comfort food. Four decades have provided valuable insights into myself if I’m willing to listen.
I’ve moved past the need to follow trends or seek validation from others. I’ve learned to prioritize emotions that truly matter and can now comfort or reprimand as needed. Dancing in my living room and singing in the shower are now regular occurrences. I’ve also developed the wisdom to recognize that many perceived offenses are insignificant and not worth my time. I choose to invest my energy in things and people that bring me joy instead of unnecessary drama. Physical activity is now a pleasure rather than a chore, and my diet includes a mix of treats, from chocolate to kale—though not simultaneously, of course!
When insecurities arise, I’ve learned strategies to silence them. They exist, but they only hold power over me if I allow it. I acknowledge that inner critic, yet I refuse to give it control over my self-worth.
I understand the dynamics of a healthy relationship, and I’m fortunate to be in one. I’ve cultivated a home, nurtured a marriage, and am actively raising a child. I’ve developed a sense of competence in these roles—not because I’m inherently special, but because I’m committed. Mistakes are part of the journey; I strive to address them rather than ignore them. I read a variety of materials, from in-depth online articles to gossip pages, embracing the balance of seriousness and light-heartedness. Social media platforms like Snapchat don’t capture my interest, nor do I feel compelled to conform.
Life has brought its share of challenges and losses, teaching me gratitude and resilience. Age is merely a number, and fearing it is unnecessary. Turning 40 is not synonymous with fear or insecurity; rather, it offers a valuable perspective. It’s not about losing youth but rather embracing the richness of four decades of experiences.
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In summary, turning 40 has been a transformative experience, bringing confidence, clarity, and a deeper understanding of myself and my relationships. I embrace this stage of life with open arms, recognizing it as an opportunity for growth and fulfillment.