By: Sophia Grant
Recently, I took my children to visit my mother’s childhood home in the Mississippi Delta. They were captivated by the stories of her past, including her playful moments in her parents’ grocery store and the solemn visit to our family cemetery. However, what truly left a mark on them was witnessing stark poverty—derelict homes, shuttered shops, and a visible absence of comfort compared to their lives in New York City. Naturally, their young minds began to ponder the differences: Where are the schools? What jobs do people have if businesses are absent? Do they even have video games here?
This experience prompted my husband and me to reflect on the values surrounding money that we are instilling in our children. We’re not merely discussing practical skills like budgeting or saving; we want to shape their mindset about what money represents and how it should influence their lives. The complexities of this topic are undeniable, so we compiled a list of important lessons:
- If choosing between a $15 item and a $25 item doesn’t require much thought, recognize that you’re in a fortunate position.
- Remember that people create wealth; wealth doesn’t define people.
- Money is just one factor that influences human behavior; many other elements play a role.
- No one wishes to be judged based on their financial status, including you.
- Money is relative; $5 for you might be $50 for someone else, and $500 for yet another. This serves as a reminder to avoid trivializing your financial situation when basic needs are met.
- If you choose to order alcohol, be prepared to pay your share. When starting out, don’t assume that costs should be split evenly. Always offer to cover your full portion, especially if you indulge in drinks.
- Never presume that your wealthier friend will pay for outings. If they do, that’s a bonus, but don’t expect it. It’s better to ensure friendships are genuine, not transactional.
- If an expense is beyond your means, opt out. Spend a moment feeling disappointed but then move on. You have friends and a job—focus on the positives.
- There’s no need to apologize for your financial situation, regardless of its state.
- Understand that there will always be someone with more and someone with less than you. The key question is whether you have what you truly need.
- Cash is often the simplest form of payment. A wise person once told me this, and it rings true. Paying with cash can be straightforward, unlike navigating complex emotional ties that can come with other forms of payment.
- Rarely is anything in life genuinely “free.” For instance, if a lawyer friend assists you without charge, you may feel indebted, leading to unspoken tensions. Ask yourself if you’re accumulating emotional debt and whether the arrangement was beneficial.
- If you reach a point where you can afford anything, that’s wonderful. However, always remember the hard work and determination it took to get there. Maintain humility and recognize the true merits and limitations of financial success.
This is a reminder that sometimes sacrifices, like foregoing luxuries such as video games, are necessary for the bigger picture.
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In summary, teaching children about money goes beyond dollars and cents. It’s about instilling a sense of gratitude, understanding, and respect for what money can and cannot do in their lives.