“May 18th,” my daughter replied, but she was mistaken. In hindsight, perhaps we should have skipped this gathering. The night before, my nearly 9-year-old had expressed her worries about attending the Birthday Book Club, as she dislikes the “rushing around” that mornings often entail. I reassured her that our schedule wouldn’t change; we would simply drive to school instead of her taking the bus. Yet, her anxiety lingered. A mere 12 hours prior to the event, she was already anxious about the alteration in our routine, a feeling I could relate to deeply.
I have often pondered whether my anxiety has been a lifelong companion or a later development. For many years, I was unaware that the emotions I experienced—anger, hesitation, frustration, and fear—were linked to Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). I was oblivious to the fact that my persistent stomachaches, headaches, and tendency towards social withdrawal stemmed from this condition. I lacked understanding of my heightened sensitivity to sounds, emotions, and situations, leaving me with a poor self-image.
As for my daughter, I can’t definitively say whether she has GAD or if she simply exhibits traits of a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP). What I do recognize is the guilt I feel regarding her struggles. However, amid this guilt, I am grateful for my ability to identify what she is experiencing. While I wish I could alleviate her discomfort, I’m thankful that I can equip her with coping strategies, ensuring she won’t be overwhelmed by her feelings—whether they are rooted in anxiety or the natural challenges of being sensitive.
After we provided the correct birthday information and her name sticker was affixed to the front page of the book, my daughter found a spot to sit and listen to the librarian read a story. She chose a seat just a few steps from where she had been standing, too anxious to seek a better view. I suggested we leave for her classroom instead, and she agreed.
As we navigated through the sea of backpacks near the library entrance, the bell rang. My third grader froze; it was the tardy bell. I reminded her that the librarian had assured us no one would be marked tardy for attending the Birthday Book Club, but she remained unconvinced.
I took her hands, made eye contact, and encouraged her to breathe. We inhaled deeply together, and after our second breath, she wrapped her arms around me tightly. We exchanged goodbyes, and she hurried down the long hallway. I stood watching until she turned the corner, wishing I could absorb her distress and carry it myself.
Being a mother while grappling with GAD and being an HSP is challenging. I often sense my daughters’ emotions before they do. My hope is to be strong enough to support them when they need it, while also being attuned to their needs even before they express them.
While my own experiences are difficult, I imagine that being my daughter might be even more challenging. Ultimately, we often have no say in the burdens we bear—only in how we choose to carry them. For more insights on navigating parenting challenges, you can explore this article.
In summary, it is essential to recognize the potential influence of parental anxiety on children. Understanding these dynamics can help in providing support and coping strategies for sensitive children. For those interested in learning more about home insemination techniques, this resource offers valuable information, and the Wikipedia entry on artificial insemination serves as an excellent reference.