Parenting can often feel like an overwhelming challenge, and it’s important to acknowledge that many of us may not always have the answers. As modern-day philosopher Louis Szekely, better known as Louis C.K., humorously points out, “Having kids can be tough because it’s often just plain boring… Listening to them read a story like Clifford the Big Red Dog can take forever, leaving you feeling both proud and utterly disengaged.”
We are not infallible beings, and our children will inevitably discover our limitations. They will demand another bedtime story when we’re exhausted, or they will interrupt moments of intimacy with requests for a glass of water. They are keen observers and will hold us accountable for our inconsistencies.
Instead of striving for perfection, I choose to embrace my humanity. I want to learn from my mistakes, apologize when necessary, and forgive myself. Parenting is a dynamic journey, and every day is a new opportunity to be the parent I aspire to be. If today doesn’t go as planned, I can forgive myself and try again tomorrow.
Recently, during an eye exam for my son Oliver, I encountered a rather brusque doctor. He wanted to administer eye drops to Oliver, which was understandable, but his approach lacked the compassion one might expect in pediatric care. Frustrated that my two-year-old wouldn’t sit still, he ordered me to restrain Oliver while he applied the drops. Despite my better judgment, I complied, holding my son down as he cried.
Afterward, while Oliver quickly moved on to play in the waiting room, I was left feeling guilty for my actions. I realized I could have found a gentler method. However, a friend reminded me that my role as a parent is not to exemplify perfection but to demonstrate humanity, compassion, and the ability to forgive.
When we got home, I took the time to apologize to Oliver, assuring him that I would never repeat that experience. This was a valuable lesson; it’s not about being flawless but about taking responsibility and modeling accountability. Children learn from both our words and actions, and if I can forgive myself, Oliver will likely learn to do the same.
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In summary, embracing our flaws as parents can foster an environment of forgiveness and growth. We can model accountability, allowing our children to learn the importance of self-forgiveness.