Every morning, I find myself persuading my children into their car seats for our daily commute to preschool and kindergarten. We often enjoy the latest Top 40 hits during the drive, as long as the music has a good rhythm and catchy melodies. I don’t focus much on song lyrics; my kids are still young enough to miss the innuendos and often misinterpret the words. At home, our dance party playlist is quite eclectic, featuring a few suggestive tracks (like Mia’s “Feathers” and Zayn’s “Dusk Till Dawn”), and there was that one time I accidentally made a CD for day care filled with explicit versions of songs instead of their radio edits—not my finest parenting moment.
However, I recently found myself taken aback by a particular song climbing the charts, a reaction that perplexes me given my usual indifference to lyrical content. The song in question contains lines that convey:
“I wanna look good for you, good for you”
This sentiment, while seemingly harmless, raises several concerns. When I reflect on the message, it implies:
- My efforts to present myself are solely for someone else’s approval.
- My appearance is of utmost importance to them, and I accept this notion.
- My self-worth is diminished, suggesting I need validation from another person.
As a parent, the thought of my daughter growing up surrounded by messages about beauty—often unhealthy ones—is disheartening. She already enjoys dressing up and pretending to be older, which is fine as long as it doesn’t overshadow her adventurous spirit. If she views dressing up as fun rather than a societal obligation, I’m all for it.
In contrast, the aforementioned song promotes the idea of conforming to someone else’s standards. The singer is portrayed as an object of admiration, prioritizing external validation over her self-identity. The repeated insistence on wanting to look good for another person sends a troubling message: that her own opinions and desires are secondary.
This pervasive concept in contemporary media is something I want my children to critically evaluate. I’m not advocating a boycott of any particular artist; rather, I aim to foster self-assured individuals who alter their appearances for their own satisfaction.
The key takeaway is to recognize and question the harmful narratives around us, and to instill in my kids the understanding that self-esteem holds greater significance than physical attractiveness. I aspire for my daughter to embrace her choices regarding her appearance as a form of self-expression, and I hope my son grows into a man who finds confidence and authenticity in a woman to be the most attractive qualities.
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In summary, it’s essential to be aware of the messages we encounter daily and guide our children toward a mindset where self-worth transcends societal beauty standards.