In my exploration of women’s experiences and insights for The Woman’s Guide to Everything (Workman, new edition 2015), I consulted numerous women who shared valuable lessons they wished they had learned sooner after graduating from college. These reflections have the power to alleviate struggles and enhance the journey through one’s 20s and 30s. Below is one such account.
Name: Clara Jenkins
Age: 32
Location: Brooklyn
Profession: I serve as the features editor at Eater.com, where I’m launching a new narrative and longform journalism program. Additionally, I contribute as an editor for the food and travel magazine Saveur, where I previously held the role of executive digital editor. I co-authored Saveur’s cookbook, The New Classics, and I write on various topics for platforms like Medium, Refinery29, and The Hairpin.
What do you know now that you wish you’d known earlier?
I wish I had understood the liberating nature of endings. Prior to graduating, I had never experienced a breakup nor resigned from a job. Yet, within ten months of entering the professional world, I faced both challenges in a span of just two weeks. At 22, I believed I would marry my boyfriend and remain in my job indefinitely. Losing both simultaneously led me to feel as though I would die alone and unemployed, as if my life had come to a close.
However, I discovered that endings can serve as a form of liberation. Through enforced self-reflection and insightful therapy, I learned about my true self, what brings me joy, and what I genuinely desire.
A decade later, these revelations continue to drive me. I have navigated more breakups and changed jobs multiple times. While the heartbreak remains, I approach these transitions with a greater understanding that life continues beyond such moments. Yes, it’s still frightening and heart-wrenching, with tears along the way. But I wish I had known earlier that you can overcome these difficulties. You retain your identity and perspective, and often emerge stronger than before.
This narrative is part of a series offering advice for women navigating their twenties. For additional insights, you can explore more women’s experiences here.
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In summary, understanding that endings can lead to new beginnings is crucial for personal growth. They may be painful at first, but they often pave the way for deeper self-discovery and resilience.