I proudly identify as a feminist. Over the past three decades, the term has become associated with negative stereotypes, often depicting feminists as hostile towards men. I assure you, that is not who I am. I don’t suffer from penis envy; instead, I experience wallet envy. To me, feminism represents the belief that women and men deserve equal treatment in all aspects of life.
I am married to a partner with whom I share an equal relationship. If we have defined roles—such as him working while I care for our children—it is not due to any perceived inferiority on my part, but rather a practical financial decision.
This morning, as I embarked on a grocery shopping trip, it was raining, which I find fitting, as Mother Nature seems to embody a feminist spirit. I approached the store, juggling an umbrella, a 20-pound infant in a car seat, and the hand of my three-year-old.
Upon reaching the entrance, I noticed an older gentleman, perhaps in his sixties, standing by the door. I assumed, as a fellow human being, he would hold the door open for me. (Note to self: never assume anything.) He simply stood there. As I set my baby carrier down in the rain, I muttered something like, “Thanks for holding the door.” His response was, “I thought you ladies didn’t want doors opened for you anymore.”
Touché, sir. My desire for assistance is not based on gender; it’s rooted in the struggle I was facing at that moment. Good manners should not depend on one’s sex but on basic decency. When women fought for their rights, some men mistakenly believed that we were rejecting kindness altogether. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
As I raise my three sons, teaching them the distinction between being a hero and simply showing basic kindness is crucial. Human decency should not be overshadowed by the feminist movement. Whether it’s an elderly woman or a strong man, if you arrive at the door first, you should hold it open—it’s simply polite.
My children may display typical childlike antics; they might annoy each other, forget their lunch boxes, or engage in endless gaming sessions. However, they will also learn to extend help to those in need. That’s what makes them my kind of kids.
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In summary, feminism does not negate the importance of good manners. It promotes the idea that kindness and respect should be extended to all, regardless of gender. As parents, instilling these values in our children is essential for fostering a compassionate society.