As summer approaches, the excitement of spending quality time with my kids fills me with joy (think berry picking, road trips, and swimming!). However, the reality of endless togetherness and unstructured days can also lead to some inevitable friction. As a work-from-home parent, the challenge of balancing my job while managing energetic kids adds another layer of complexity to the season.
While it’s refreshing to take a break from early mornings, lunch packing, and homework, it can quickly turn into chaos. The freedom of lounging in pajamas is lovely, but without some structure, we can quickly become cranky and sluggish. Our household thrives on routine, and after navigating the delicate balance of fun and structure in past summers, I’ve gathered a few sanity-saving strategies from friends and my own experiences.
Go All In or All Out
I recently came across a fantastic article by the insightful Emily Carter, who emphasizes the importance of giving her tween and teen children either her full attention or none at all. There’s no sneaking a glance at emails during family card games or walks. Likewise, her kids know they can’t interrupt her work for trivial matters (just like me, Emily works from home). This approach allows her to be wholly present with her kids during playtime and then switch gears to focus on her work. It nurtures their independence while ensuring they feel secure in her attention.
Although I’m still mastering this practice, I’m striving to set boundaries. Even if I’m washing dishes or need a quick shower, I remind myself (and my kids) that they can wait. “I’ll finish here, and then I can help you or play with you,” I tell them. They’ll manage just fine, and it benefits all of us.
Engage the Neighborhood
In today’s world of organized playdates, summer doesn’t resemble our carefree childhood days of roaming the neighborhood. Many kids are either in camps or under constant parental supervision, making it harder to let them roam free. To remedy this, my neighbors and I have exchanged phone numbers to create a community of summer play. We text each other with updates like “kids are playing in the sprinkler, feel free to join!” or “sending my kid outside; is anyone around to play?” Not only do our kids benefit, but our bonds have strengthened as well.
Establish a Flexible Framework
A friend of mine, who works full-time, has her kids sit down with their babysitter at the beginning of summer to create a wishlist of activities. This balances low-cost outings with special events. I do something similar to manage expectations and add a little structure to our days. Additionally, having some daily routine can prevent the dreaded “What should we do today?” paralysis that can lead to hours of inactivity. Some weeks, we set up a morning camp for the kids, with no screens allowed until afternoon. Late afternoons might involve swimming, while evenings could include baseball games. Whatever the choices, having an idea of how our days might unfold brings reassurance.
Embrace the Summer Vibes
While some structure is beneficial, let’s not forget that it’s summer vacation for a reason. This time is inherently different from the hustle and bustle of the school year. No one—parent or child—is going to accomplish as much during this season. So perhaps we can ease up on the math workbooks and allow for some flexibility in our work schedules as well, whether that means shorter hours or even taking some well-deserved vacation time.
Amidst all the planning and attempts to maintain sanity, it’s crucial to appreciate the magic of summer—the warmth, the evening thunderstorms, the enchanting fireflies, and the casualness of summer outfits. I recognize that this time is fleeting, and each summer is a step closer to my kids growing up and heading into their own adult adventures.
When sibling squabbles and wet towels clutter the floor, it’s easy to lose sight of the simple joys. Now is the perfect time for lazy walks in the woods, creek play, and indulging in ice cream for lunch. Now is the moment to let go of “shoulds” and enjoy bubble-blowing, picnic table lounging in swimsuits, and relishing the twilight until darkness falls.
This summer is here, and it’s ours to savor. September—and every September to come—will be here before we know it.
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In summary, embrace the chaos, find joy in the little moments, and let this summer be one for the books!
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