As you embark on the journey of motherhood, your body undergoes significant transformations that are largely unavoidable. As your baby develops, so do you—often in ways you may not anticipate. You essentially become a living space for another human being. Just as no one desires to live in a cramped environment, your baby yearns for ample room to thrive. This little being demands a lot from you—your nutrients, your energy, and sometimes, even your mental clarity. You willingly provide it all because the bond of love begins even before birth. Pregnancy marks your initiation into motherhood; your needs take a backseat, and they may never return to the forefront.
Historically, society has accepted that mothers may not regain their pre-pregnancy bodies. This acceptance was once a normative experience across cultures. But in recent years, the narrative has shifted. We are inundated with images of celebrities like Mia Thompson and Alison Rodriguez, who appear to bounce back effortlessly after childbirth. It’s frustrating to see these figures, who seem to defy the laws of post-pregnancy reality, making the rest of us feel inadequate. As if the monumental task of nurturing a new life isn’t challenging enough, we now face the additional pressure to maintain an unrealistic standard of physical appearance. The mere thought of it is enough to make me want to pour another glass of wine.
And so begins the relentless cycle of self-improvement: Diets, workout regimens, beauty treatments, and various lifestyle changes fill our minds. After I welcomed my second child, I took up running, an activity I found both monotonous and taxing. I spent eight months training, completing two 5Ks—although I walked much of the second one—and ultimately abandoned running as quickly as I had adopted it. My motivation? A desire to reclaim my figure and feel like a “hot mom.” Who wouldn’t want that? With so many images of glamorous mothers flooding our feeds, I longed for the confidence that comes with feeling fit.
Today, I encountered a concept that pushed me over the edge: Babywearing Ballet. Seriously? While many parents swear by babywearing, I find it a necessity during moments of distress when my infant requires comfort. I have three children and simply cannot juggle a fussy baby while also trying to engage in a workout.
Yes, I recognize the need to get back in shape, and I am aware of the consequences of neglecting my health. I feel heavier, and I actually looked better while pregnant. I enjoy food and wine too much to just sit idly. However, carrying my 19-pound, five-month-old does not count as a workout, much to my chagrin.
I can’t help but feel bewildered by the babywearing ballet trend. If a parent can afford to attend a fitness class, shouldn’t we allow them the opportunity to exercise without the added burden of strapping their baby to them? Is it too much to ask for a single, uninterrupted hour to focus on oneself? A mere 60 minutes where you can leave your child in a gym daycare and simply unwind? The pressure to involve our babies in every aspect of our lives feels overwhelming.
I have friends who are in phenomenal shape—truly inspiring. They have the dedication and resources to maintain their fitness, but none of them are in the throes of early motherhood. Their children are older, allowing them to utilize that time effectively. Perhaps in three years, I might find myself in a similar position, but that is merely wishful thinking.
The trend of incorporating babies into fitness regimes strikes me as a troubling form of societal conditioning. If you’re spending money on a class, why not ensure childcare is included? I refuse to pay for something that doesn’t allow me a break. The expectation to appear fit and youthful is exhausting when there’s little time for self-care. The reality is that achieving that ideal look often comes at a steep price, which many of us simply cannot afford.
In the end, I know what I can obtain for $20—tacos. And at least they’re delicious.
For more insights into the complexities of post-pregnancy bodies, you may want to check out our post here. If you’re interested in understanding more about fertility and pregnancy, I recommend exploring this resource. Additionally, for those considering home insemination, Make A Mom is an authority on the subject.
Summary
The pressures of motherhood often leave new moms feeling inadequate, especially when faced with unrealistic post-pregnancy expectations perpetuated by media portrayals. The trend of babywearing ballet exemplifies the struggle to balance self-care with the demands of parenting, highlighting that sometimes, all a mother needs is a little time for herself.