When I was anticipating my first child, I was consumed with the idea of preparing for my new arrival. “I need to create a checklist!” I proclaimed a month before my son was due. Upon rediscovering that list, I realized how naive I was back then. Here’s a glimpse of my pre-parenthood thoughts:
THINGS TO DO BEFORE BABY
- Pack a hospital bag with snacks, cosmetics, music, books, and my laptop because labor could last for days, according to the pregnancy literature.
- Aim to have regular bowel movements to avoid any embarrassing moments during labor.
- Purchase a new swimsuit and curate a playlist for a serene water birth experience.
- Watch more birthing documentaries online (knowledge is indeed power).
- Wash all brand-new baby clothes using gentle, baby-friendly detergent.
- Clean all our personal laundry with the same baby-safe soap.
- Launder all crib bedding with baby-approved detergent.
- Consult with my midwife about whether I should wash sofa covers and muslin cloths in baby-friendly soap.
- Disinfect the entire house daily with antibacterial wipes until the baby arrives.
- Engage in pelvic floor exercises consistently to make up for the lack of practice during the previous nine months.
- Neatly groom my bikini area to avoid any potential issues during birth.
- Invest in books and DVDs to keep me entertained during maternity leave.
- Get my partner to promise to avoid looking at the ‘bottom end’ during delivery.
- Learn to bake a cake (or at least cookies).
- Purchase a cake recipe book.
- Acquire a cake pan.
- Revisit “What to Expect When You’re Expecting” (again).
- Practice perineal massage (perhaps with the help of an online tutorial?).
- Enjoy a romantic dinner with my partner since that may not be possible for at least six weeks post-baby.
- CONGRATULATIONS! You’ve completed this list! Now, take some time to relax before the baby arrives!
In reality, I never made it past the first item on my list. “First babies are always late,” I was told. “You’ll likely give birth a couple of weeks after your due date.” But that was not the case. I was happily indulging in a burger (our romantic meal) when my water broke. My partner and I scrambled to gather essentials and raced to the hospital, where my daughter arrived almost immediately, rendering my meticulous preparations moot.
I had to bring my newborn home to a house that was still in disarray, smelling of fast food, and dress her in clothes that weren’t even washed in baby-safe detergent. I quickly learned that the planning was far less important than I initially believed.
When I was pregnant with my second child, I abandoned any notion of creating a to-do list. With one child already on the outside and another kicking me from the inside, I found myself too exhausted for such tasks. I discarded the books and skipped the baking altogether.
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In summary, while preparing for a baby can feel overwhelming, it’s important to remember that the reality may not align with expectations. Embrace the chaos and take each moment as it comes.