Updated: Oct. 29, 2020
Originally Published: April 12, 2011
In my teenage years, I experienced a peculiar moment where I dreamt my former partner had penned a love letter from Venezuela. Upon waking, I dashed to the mailbox, only to discover a letter from him waiting for me. If that doesn’t validate psychic abilities, I’m not sure what does.
Regrettably, I’ve never been able to harness this foresight at will. However, since becoming a mother, I’ve found my predictive instincts have intensified. After conversing with fellow moms, I’ve learned that many share this uncanny trait. It appears that motherhood comes with a built-in ability to anticipate future events.
Classic Scenarios of Prediction
Take, for example, the classic scenario of drink-spilling (this may resonate with many): One evening, while my family was embroiled in a lively dinner, I observed my son, Ethan (age 6), bouncing in his seat with a drink in hand. I felt a familiar unease: He’s about to spill that drink.
Determined to intervene, I warned, “Ethan, you’re going to spill your drink. Please be careful.” I thought I had prevented an impending disaster.
Not quite. Moments later, his drink erupted across the table in a spectacular mess.
Sound familiar? While it may be a bit embarrassing to admit, I often find myself saying “I told you so.” I do this not just because I can be annoyingly persistent, but because it’s important to highlight the wisdom that often goes unacknowledged. Learning from our experiences is crucial, right? If my repeated warnings were recognized, maybe I wouldn’t have to say “I told you so” so often.
So, after the incident, I employed my classic “I told you so” approach and sent Ethan to time-out, ensuring he cleaned up the mess first. I clarified, “You’re not in time-out for spilling your drink; you’re in time-out because you ignored my warning.” I like to think this was a moment of effective parenting.
The Futility of Prediction
As Ethan sat in time-out, my husband, who works as an engineer, remarked that I did indeed possess predictive abilities. He further noted that our family had inadvertently examined the age-old question: “If one can predict the future, can they alter it?” Unfortunately, the conclusion seems to be: No. Even when you foresee an event, you cannot change its course.
So, while mothers may have this incredible talent for prediction, it often proves to be futile. Foreseeing an event (and attempting to prevent it) can create unnecessary tension leading up to the inevitable outcome. In fact, my experience suggests that warning about a potential mishap can actually increase its likelihood. Perhaps when I see my child precariously holding a drink, remaining silent might be the best course of action. But let’s be honest—I doubt I could hold my tongue in such moments.
I find myself wishing for a new superpower; this one is rather unhelpful.
Resources for Further Reading
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Summary
This article delves into the humorous yet frustrating reality of mothers possessing an uncanny ability to predict events, particularly in their children’s behavior. Despite this talent, the ability often leads to unnecessary stress, as attempts to avert predicted outcomes can sometimes exacerbate the situation. The author shares personal anecdotes to illustrate this phenomenon and encourages readers to seek out helpful resources for topics like home insemination.