Why I Blog…
My daughter, Lila, writes in her journal nearly every day. Her reflections are far more profound than mine were at her age. Recently, I stumbled upon my own third-grade diary, filled with entries that mostly said things like, “Dear Diary, we had peas again for lunch,” or “Dear Diary, Jason likes me,” or “Dear Diary, my brother is a pest.” It’s amusing to realize that I misspelled ‘diary’ throughout the entire year, and how could I possibly share my innermost secrets when I was addressing a dairy instead?
Lila doesn’t read my blog, and I don’t delve into her journal, but she recently asked me why I choose to blog rather than keep a private journal like I did when I was younger. It’s a thought-provoking question, especially considering how private our childhood diaries were. They were securely locked, with keys worn around our necks, and our cherished words were hidden under pillows and deep inside drawers behind closed doors.
Now, however, our thoughts are displayed for everyone to see. Personal feelings, intimate experiences, and daily happenings are out in the open. It’s an odd shift in perspective regarding journaling. Nevertheless, I don’t share my most vulnerable thoughts on my blog; those remain safely tucked away in my heart, accessible only to me. My blog is not my diary—or my dairy. It simply exists as a space for expression.
In any writing endeavor, there are times when you just need to step away. I recall finding months of blank pages in my childhood diaries, and I don’t want Lila and her sister, Sophie, to look back at my blog one day and wonder why I was sometimes silent. Life was undoubtedly happening during those quiet times; perhaps I was busy, or the words just wouldn’t flow, or I didn’t want to write about the hard stuff.
On those days when the urge to delete everything and walk away strikes, I remind myself of Lila’s question… Dear children, here’s why I blog:
- To preserve memories of your childhood. I’m unlikely to print photos, fill out baby books, or create elaborate scrapbooks for you. Instead, this blog, alongside countless pictures stored on my hard drives, will serve as your treasure trove of memories.
- At times, I feel isolated in motherhood. No one mentions how lonely it can be, but through writing, I can express myself—even if it’s just to me—and feel a sense of communication.
- The internet has connected me with incredible individuals. Through our blogs and social media, we’ve formed our own little communities, and I’ve made lasting friendships.
- I want you to see me as more than just your mom. I’m not the best verbal storyteller, and I don’t want you to wake up in your 40s and wonder what I was like. A simple search here will reveal the person I am. There are so many questions I wish I had asked my grandmother; I don’t want you to have the same regrets.
- Writing allows me to capture our experiences. If I don’t jot them down, I fear they’ll slip away. It’s the small moments that matter—like last night when Sophie was attempting to play rock-paper-scissors with our dog. I want to remember those delightful instances.
- Sometimes my jokes may fall flat for you, but perhaps someone else will find them amusing. It’s worth sharing them with a broader audience.
- I genuinely enjoy writing. It’s fulfilling and brings joy to my mind. I aspire to maintain the ability to write until my last day, no matter when that may be.
Love you both,
Mom
P.S. You might want to consider starting a blog yourself. Trust me on this. There will be plenty of my advice you might not follow, but this one… I hope it resonates with you.
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In summary, blogging serves as a vital means for me to capture memories, connect with others, and express my thoughts in a way that a private diary never could. It helps bridge the gap between generations, ensuring that you will always know who I am beyond just being your mother.