In the realm of aging, societal expectations often delineate clear boundaries—such as cutting hair, retiring miniskirts, or adopting kale as a dietary staple. However, these notions overlook the vibrant nuances of womanhood that emerge as we mature. Upon reaching 40, we do not simply transform into one-dimensional figures; instead, we enter a phase where self-discovery flourishes. This transitional space is where we embrace our authenticity—perhaps we express ourselves with a bit more attitude, enjoy a more fulfilling intimate life, or experiment with bold makeup choices.
Reflecting on a decade ago, I recall collaborating with a diverse group of women in our 30s, all engaged in an after-school program for at-risk youth. We hailed from various backgrounds—some were married, I was newly engaged, and none of us had children yet. Driven and passionate, we found ourselves grooving to Justin Timberlake’s “SexyBack” one day in the office. A colleague named Sarah exclaimed, “Maybe I’m too old for this Top 40 music, but I absolutely love this track.” Everyone resonated with her statement, but it lingered in my thoughts. Can we ever really be “too old” for music? When did age dictate our enjoyment of certain melodies?
There are those timeless elements that simply resonate, regardless of age. For instance, I possess a T-shirt that, while not extraordinary, has a cut and fabric that accentuate all the right features. It has the remarkable ability to make me feel beautiful, even on my less-than-stellar days.
Here are several other aspects that enhance my confidence, devoid of age considerations:
- A Crisp White Shirt: Whether it’s a classic white tee or a button-down, the nostalgia of growing up with icons like Ralph Lauren and Bruce Springsteen imbues a white shirt with a sense of effortless style and charm.
- My Favorite Jeans: A few years back, I splurged on a pair of jeans that felt transformative. They were slightly distressed, fitting perfectly in all the right places. Over time, the wear has only added character, satisfying my inner 1980s child.
- The Black Crowes’ ‘Hard to Handle’: This song always energizes me. Though I may occasionally misquote the lyrics, it never inhibits my enthusiasm to sing along. I refuse to let age dictate my enjoyment of this anthem.
- A Good Hair Day: I proudly acknowledge that those days when everything falls into place with my hair can significantly uplift my mood.
- Painted Toenails: Whether done at a salon or at home, vibrant toenails in colors like silver or red serve as a reminder of self-care and personal enjoyment.
- Next-Day Looks: In college, a friend mentioned how your hair looks fantastic the day after intimacy. While I may not confirm the hair theory, the secret glances shared with my partner the day after are undeniably fulfilling.
Ultimately, the elements that instill a sense of beauty and confidence in us are ageless. There are certain joys we never outgrow. I refuse to let societal norms define what is deemed “appropriate” for my age. Interestingly, I am also discovering a newfound appreciation for kale smoothies.
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In summary, the journey through our 40s can be vibrant and fulfilling, as we embrace the elements that make us feel alive and confident, regardless of age.