Before I became a mother, I had my fair share of preconceived notions. I was certain I’d never own a minivan, I’d avoid yoga pants at all costs, and I absolutely wouldn’t be the type of mom who yelled at her children. Observing frazzled mothers in yoga attire, struggling to control their kids in stores, I was convinced that, if I ever became a parent, I wouldn’t raise my voice. Oh, how naive I was!
Motherhood swiftly brought me down to earth, and I quickly learned that a little yelling is often necessary when you’re raising kids. Now, I find myself hissing at my children to be quiet in church or adopting a stern expression in public when they misbehave. Yes, I’ve become that mom.
However, before you judge me too harshly, let me clarify that I’m not talking about shouting. I’ve come to realize that there are various subtle methods of “yelling” that we moms employ. I suspect you, too, might recognize some of these techniques in your own parenting journey.
1. Pursed Lips, aka “The Silent Commander”
This method usually comes with a stern “Get over here!” and is perfect for those situations when your kids are acting up in front of relatives or creating chaos in quiet places. It’s particularly effective in movie theaters when you need to hush them without making a sound.
2. Clenched Teeth, aka “I Said No”
If you’ve ever been in a grocery store and witnessed a mom with clenched teeth issuing a firm warning, you know this tactic well. It’s reserved for those moments when you simply cannot repeat “no” one more time, especially when the ice cream truck rolls by or when they beg for more tokens at a local play center.
3. The Single Eyebrow Raise, aka “Stop Right There”
I’ve mastered the Single Eyebrow Raise, which instantly halts my kids in their tracks, even from a distance. It’s highly effective in public spaces where they might be misbehaving out of earshot. Whether at museums or playgrounds, this non-verbal cue speaks volumes.
4. The Unsettling Smile, aka “The Singsong Voice”
My brothers and I were experts at mischief during family gatherings, and we knew we were in trouble when our mom adopted that eerily sweet tone, saying things like, “You really need to stop that, sweetie.” That smile and the sugary voice always signaled that we would hear about it later.
5. Complete and Total Rage, aka “When It All Comes Crashing Down”
Let’s be honest; we’ve all had those moments when frustration boils over, whether it’s a carton of eggs smashed on the floor or a favorite item being flushed down the toilet. This style of yelling is the least glamorous but often unavoidable in the chaos of parenting.
6. Total Silence, aka “Things Just Got Serious”
Sometimes, silence speaks louder than words. This tactic, often used with teenagers, can leave kids feeling unsettled. It’s a rare but powerful response when you’re simply at a loss for words due to sheer frustration.
While I’m not proud of those moments when I lose my cool, I acknowledge that sometimes a mom has to do what she must to maintain order. For more insights on parenting and to explore other topics, check out this engaging read on the six stages of mom yelling.
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In summary, motherhood brings many challenges, including the necessity of finding various ways to communicate boundaries with our children. Whether through pursed lips, clenched teeth, or total silence, we all have our unique styles of parenting that keep our little ones in line.