Why the Emergency Room Isn’t a First-Come, First-Serve System

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The emergency room (ER) operates on a principle of urgency and necessity, not simply who arrives first. This is a crucial distinction that often gets lost in the chaos of waiting rooms filled with anxious patients and their families. I can still vividly remember the tension that hung in the air as I caught sight of another parent’s glare. The anger was palpable, and I felt a wave of anxiety wash over me. I had no desire to engage with someone who might lash out, especially after witnessing violent confrontations in the past when my child’s name was called ahead of others.

Years ago, a nurse was physically attacked while trying to calm a frustrated individual who felt that their loved one deserved immediate attention over my own child, who was visibly unwell. It’s disheartening to think that a parent’s pain can morph into hostility, especially in an environment where everyone is already on edge due to their own suffering.

I want to clarify that I derive no pleasure from the priority my family experiences in the ER. I am acutely aware of the disdain directed toward me as I pass through the waiting room. I witnessed you, hunched over a bucket, battling nausea, and I do not take joy in being attended to before you. I saw you comforting your child with a broken wrist, and as a mother, I understand the agony of waiting for help. It’s uncomfortable for me to know that my child’s needs are prioritized over yours.

You are not alone in your discomfort; I see the worry etched on your faces, the tension in your shoulders as you await your names to be called. But I know my child’s name will be called first, and as we walk away, I can hear the muttered complaints and the accusations that we are somehow receiving special treatment. I want to assure you that I understand your frustration. I’ve heard the whispers and felt the eyes on me, but I assure you, I don’t revel in this experience.

If it were up to me, I would rather be dealing with a benign issue like a broken wrist or a mild stomach bug. The minutes spent waiting can mean the difference between life and death for my child. My son suffers from a urea cycle disorder called citrullinemia. This condition means that when something goes awry in his body, we must act swiftly because the consequences can be dire. You may not see the urgency; he might look fine, laughing or playing, but inside, he could be fighting an invisible enemy.

Ammonia levels can rise, leading to severe complications. He could appear lethargic or hyperactive, and if untreated, the consequences can be catastrophic. This isn’t just a story; it’s our reality. The emergency department is our only option for crucial tests, and every visit is an arduous journey filled with anxiety. We don’t have the luxury of monitoring his levels at home.

I understand the frustration of waiting, but my child cannot afford to wait for long periods. Each moment in the waiting room carries the risk of exposure to more germs or viruses that could exacerbate his condition. When I enter the ER, I do so with a protocol letter from his specialist that outlines urgent care needs. The staff knows him, recognizes the urgency, and understands the gravity of his situation because we’ve been through this process countless times.

So, when my son’s name is called sooner than others, please recognize that it’s not favoritism. It’s about the severity of his condition and the need for immediate intervention. Just as a patient with chest pain requires prompt attention over someone with a less urgent complaint, my son’s unique needs dictate the speed of care he receives.

I empathize with your suffering as you navigate your own health challenges. I didn’t choose this life, but I’m grateful for the medical professionals who act swiftly and for the understanding of those who can see beyond the surface. My child simply needs to be seen first, and for that, I am truly sorry.

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Summary:

The emergency room prioritizes patients based on the urgency of their conditions, not on arrival time. As a parent of a child with a critical health issue, I understand the frustration when my child is seen before others. However, the swift response is necessary to prevent life-threatening complications. I empathize with the struggles of other patients and hope for understanding regarding the complexities we face.

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