I can still vividly recall the day you entered my life; it feels like just yesterday, but it’s been two years now. I remember those early nights in the hospital so clearly — your dad had to go home to help your older brother settle down for sleep. My mom came to keep me company and snoozed on the uncomfortable faux-leather sofa while I lay awake, filled with uncertainty.
Could I really manage more sleepless nights? Could I handle two young children when your dad returned to work? Would I be a good enough mom? At that moment, I felt like the answer to all those questions was a resounding no. The reality is that I often found myself calling your dad at work, overwhelmed and in tears. I’m not perfect — as a person or as a mother — and I struggled deeply.
But here we are, two years later, and I understand why people say, “This won’t last forever,” or “Don’t be the first to let go when your child hugs you.” I realize that, while I may not be the ideal mother, I’m the one you have.
I don’t always marvel at the little moments like story time together. Sometimes I’d rather scroll through my phone. But even the toughest days with you — yes, even the days that test my patience — are still my favorite.
As night falls, I often think about the missed opportunities throughout the day — when I could have been more present, reacted differently, or simply paused to focus on you. It’s painful because I’m not ashamed of wanting some quiet time to myself, yet I know each of these fleeting moments accumulates. I watch you grow from a baby into a little girl, and it stings to realize how much less you need me each day.
What weighs on my heart is knowing that one day you’ll choose how much time you want to spend with me, and I hope you’ll always feel the depth of my love for you, despite my imperfections.
I can still recall the day I became your mom as if it just happened. But time flies — before I know it, 20 years will have passed. I’ll be that older, wiser mother sharing stories about how quickly it all goes by, holding onto memories of your babyhood instead of your tiny hand.
Being your mother is the hardest, most fulfilling role I’ve ever taken on. And every day, you show me that I made the right choice. Every sparkle in your bright blue eyes or even your furrowed brow reminds me of the joy and challenges of motherhood.
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In summary, being your mom is a beautiful, complex journey filled with challenges and endless love. I embrace every moment, knowing that even amidst the chaos, these are the best days of my life.