Dear Millennial Parent,
I see you over there, managing a lively toddler whose tousled curls are almost as chaotic as the scene unfolding at your table. Your little one is squirming, desperately trying to make a break for it from the high chair, while you do your best to maintain a semblance of calm. Your partner slips away to grab a drink — good man. You pull out your phone and capture a moment that’s about to go off the rails while soothing the baby strapped to your chest. Nearby, two older women are casting judgmental glances your way. Are they annoyed by your child’s antics, your phone usage, or both?
I can only imagine the status update you’re contemplating. (Please don’t take that the wrong way.)
Just as your husband sets down your wine, chaos erupts: crayons scatter, wine spills, and the baby wails. The older ladies at the next table are now watching, arms crossed. I can see the embarrassment creeping up your neck as you frantically clean up the mess, comfort the crying baby, and half-heartedly ask your husband to intervene with the toddler who’s now in full meltdown mode. You know you’re not going to recover from this. All you wanted was a moment to enjoy that glass of wine, a delicious burger, and a side of sweet potato fries. When the food finally comes, you simply ask for a to-go box.
While those women chuckle over their salads, I’m sitting across the room, my heart breaking for you. I’m a Gen X mom with a perfectly well-behaved 5-year-old; I’m enjoying my wine, thanks to the fact that my daughter is happily munching on butter straight from the dish that accompanies the breadbasket. Despite the generational gap, I completely understand your struggle. Parenting can feel like a circus, no matter when you became a parent.
Thanks to my third child, born later in life, I often find myself among millennial parents like you. Yes, I might find your constant phone use a little baffling, and some of your parenting decisions may puzzle me, but guess what? We share a common goal: raising happy, healthy kids. Sure, my style may lean towards skinny jeans instead of yoga pants, and I might prefer a nude lip gloss over vibrant red, but ultimately, we’re in this together. And you’re doing an incredible job, even if it doesn’t always feel that way.
You’re navigating a sea of information that didn’t exist when I had my first child. For you, sharing your parenting journey online is as second nature as following sleep schedules was for me. You willingly engage in this digital world — from candid Instagram posts to virtual support groups — and I completely understand the allure. You don’t want to go through this alone. While you maintain real-life friendships, your vibrant online community is always there, shining through your phone screen, offering you support when you need it most.
I didn’t have that luxury back in the day. For me, connecting with other moms meant stepping outside my door, which was hard due to postpartum challenges. When I did manage to go out, I often wore a mask of perfection that wasn’t real. Your openness and willingness to connect feel more genuine than the facade many from my generation felt compelled to maintain during those early years.
I know the feeling of being judged, just like you’ve probably felt from the ladies at the next table. But let me tell you, ignore them. Parenting is an uphill battle, and you’re doing wonderfully. When you take a moment to snap a photo and post it online, it doesn’t mean you’re neglecting your kids — it means you’re taking a brief moment for yourself amidst the chaos. That’s something I wish I could have allowed myself back then. That little moment of connection can help you power through the next seven minutes as you wrangle your children and make a mad dash for the car.
But please don’t leave out of embarrassment. I know how hard it is just to get out of the house, and I can only imagine the frustration of having to cut your outing short. I’ve been there — raising kids is no easy feat, and while it may not get easier, it will surely evolve. You’ll discover your unique parenting style and what works best for you. One day, you’ll sit down at a restaurant with your kids and savor that burger, fries, and glass of wine from start to finish.
And when that moment comes, I hope you share it online for everyone to see. Because that’s a moment worth celebrating. For more insights on parenting and home insemination, check out this post on Cervical Insemination. If you’re looking for at-home insemination kits, Make a Mom is a reputable online retailer you can trust. And for a deeper dive into pregnancy and fertility, Cleveland Clinic’s podcast is an excellent resource.
In summary, I see you, I understand you, and I want you to know that you’re doing great. Embrace your journey, and don’t forget to celebrate the small victories along the way.