I often tell myself that my goal is to ensure my kids have a better life than I did. I want them to experience everything I missed out on during my childhood—the opportunities, the advantages, the open doors. It’s a universal wish among parents, rooted in love and care.
But let’s be honest: it’s a bit of a fantasy.
I crave possessions and wealth, convinced that they will bring happiness to my family and me. Advertising has spun a web of lies, luring me into a cycle of dissatisfaction with my life. Part of me believes that if I could just be thinner, if my kids participated in more activities, or if we exclusively consumed organic kale from high-end grocery stores, we would find some perfect state of bliss where life flows smoothly, and our smiles are everlasting.
But that’s simply not the case. Deep down, we all know the truth: material possessions won’t bring lasting happiness. Yes, it’s perfectly normal to desire things, but those things won’t resolve the issues in my life. My life is fine; it’s my perspective that often needs a shift.
Shifting Perspectives
Take, for instance, my desire to own a house. At 33, I’m tired of apartment living. My parents never owned a home, so the thought of having my own space—where I can make modifications and enjoy a yard for my kids—excites me. Yet, owning a home also means taking on a mortgage, property taxes, and the responsibility of repairs. There’s no landlord to call when the toilet breaks at midnight; it’s all on us, and these responsibilities come with a price tag and time commitment that most parents can hardly afford.
Every situation has its pros and cons, making it easy to get lost in the allure of what we want. New cars, dream jobs, milestones for our children—if only we could achieve these, life would surely improve, right? We convince ourselves that our worries would shrink if we just got what we desired. The future seems full of promise, but the reality is that a better life exists in the present, not waiting for us down the road.
Finding Joy in the Present
It’s all about perspective. Sure, I could dwell on my husband’s social awkwardness in new situations, but I choose to cherish the moments he makes me laugh uncontrollably. I could complain about how thin the walls are in our apartment, allowing me to hear my neighbor’s cat doing its business, but instead, I appreciate how quickly I can clean my small space and the fact that we have a handyman on speed dial for emergencies.
Setting goals and aspiring for a better life for ourselves and our children is commendable. However, it’s crucial to recognize both sides of the equation and understand the implications of those changes. A spacious home might seem ideal until the reality of maintenance sets in. But hey, if you have a big house, can I come crash with you until I find my own? I’m pretty tired of hearing my neighbor’s cat.
Further Reading and Resources
For more insights into navigating parenthood and our evolving desires, check out this post. And if you’re considering at-home insemination options, this kit is a reputable resource. Additionally, for further help with pregnancy and infertility, this support group can be an excellent place to start.
Summary
We often get caught up in the pursuit of more, believing that material possessions will lead to happiness. However, true fulfillment lies in appreciating what we have in the present. It’s essential to maintain a balanced perspective, recognizing both the positives and negatives of our desires while pursuing a better life for ourselves and our children.