By: Jenna Carter
For the first time in years, both of my children are at school all day long. This means for six glorious hours, I’m home alone. Sure, I’m working from home, so it’s not like I’m just lounging around in my pajamas—though that sounds tempting! Aside from my two rambunctious dogs, I have the house to myself. And let me tell you, it’s pure bliss.
Don’t misunderstand me; I adore my family more than anything. However, there are times when a woman just craves a peaceful house, free from the sounds of sports commentary blaring from the TV, wrestling matches erupting in the living room, or the chaos of arguments over video game turns. Living in a household dominated by males—two sons and a husband—can get a bit, shall we say, loud. Honestly, it can be overwhelming at times, and there’s only so much commotion a person can handle.
Recently, my kids were home for an extended holiday break. While it was a joy to swap out our usual schedule for lazy, cozy days in our pajamas, by the end of that break, I felt like I was about to lose my mind. The morning they returned to school, I might have done a little happy dance in my kitchen—before diving back into work, of course.
The reality is, while I treasure my family and the moments we share, I also require significant alone time to recharge. When I’m by myself, I can breathe freely, think clearly, and even enjoy a moment of privacy in the bathroom without little ones barging in.
It’s important to note that alone time is not the same as “me time,” even though they can sometimes coincide. “Me time” typically implies indulging in something enjoyable or relaxing—like a spa day, a night out with friends, or a special dinner date with my partner. These activities nourish our spirits and help us unwind from the daily grind of parenting, which can often feel relentless. While “me time” is vital, it differs from mere alone time.
Alone time simply means being by myself. It doesn’t matter if I’m being productive, organizing my closet, journaling, or even shopping online; the key aspect is that I’m doing it without interruptions or social obligations.
For many parents, particularly those who are stay-at-home moms, finding alone time can feel like searching for a unicorn. However, it doesn’t have to involve long hours or extravagant getaways. Alone time can be as simple as sneaking in a few extra minutes in the bathroom or taking a brief walk around the block after the kids are asleep.
Of course, there are trade-offs. Sometimes, I wake up before dawn, sacrificing sleep for those precious moments of solitude. I exercise, check emails, and enjoy a peaceful start to my day. Even though I’m often exhausted, that stillness is invaluable. When all else fails, I’ve learned that nothing clears the house like announcing I’m having a rough day and plan to spend the afternoon cleaning in a frenzy.
Having this time to myself—free from kids asking for snacks or adults needing my attention—is not a luxury; it’s a necessity. It’s in these quiet moments, when I’m not engaged in the roles of wife or mother, that I reconnect with myself. This allows me to return to those roles reinvigorated and ready to be the best partner and parent I can be.
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In summary, while I love my family dearly, carving out time for myself is crucial. Alone time is more than just a break; it’s an essential part of maintaining balance in my life as a parent. Cherishing these moments of solitude helps me reconnect and be my best self for those I love.