My son has spent countless nights—roughly 3,642—cozying up with his beloved blankie, and I estimate he has dedicated about 6,783 hours to thumb-sucking. You know the saying: “Your child won’t go to college or walk down the aisle while sucking their thumb or clutching their blankie”? Well, my child might just prove that notion wrong.
Like many parents, I had my concerns about my growing child’s thumb-sucking habit. At nearly 10 years old, he was certainly on the older side of the spectrum for such behavior—whatever “acceptable” means in this context. I worried about potential teasing from peers, the possibility of dental issues, and whether I was failing as a parent for not being more proactive in addressing his attachment to his comfort items.
Despite my worries, I never felt compelled to force him to stop. As long as he had his blankie and thumb, he was a sound sleeper—so why disrupt a routine that worked well for both of us?
However, not everyone shared my laid-back approach. A couple of years back, I took him to an orthodontist due to early tooth loss, as recommended by our dentist. When I mentioned my son was a thumb-sucker, the orthodontist felt it necessary to employ a rather outdated tactic: shame. He turned to my son and asked, “What would your friends think if they found out you suck your thumb?”
I was furious, but my son had the perfect retort: “They wouldn’t say anything… because they’re my friends.” A-freaking-men!
Needless to say, we switched orthodontists, opting for one who didn’t resort to shame tactics and reminded us that my son would stop thumb-sucking when he was ready. In fact, he reassured me that it was a non-issue. Experts often remind parents to calm down when it comes to prolonged thumb-sucking or reliance on comfort objects. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, thumb-sucking is a natural way for children to self-soothe. They suggest that most children will phase out these habits naturally as they mature and find alternative coping mechanisms.
While many kids typically outgrow thumb-sucking before school, those who don’t may face unnecessary pressure to quit, which can lead to more harm than good. Rest assured, your child will eventually move on from these habits when they are ready.
For nearly a decade, my son found solace in his snugs with his blankie while sucking his thumb, and while I occasionally stressed about it, we never took drastic measures. Then, without warning, he stopped—just like that. He hasn’t sucked his thumb in months, and his blankie is now tucked away at the bottom of my nightstand. I’m honestly a bit surprised (and slightly nostalgic) about that.
Was my son a bit late to abandon his thumb-sucking? Maybe. Could we have taken his blankie away or pressured him to stop? Absolutely. But to what end? What would we have sacrificed by pushing him to “grow up” prematurely? Most importantly, wouldn’t we have shown him that others’ opinions hold more weight than his own comfort?
Regardless of whether thumb-sucking or any other comforting behavior is deemed a bad habit, one fact stands out: shame is counterproductive. Genuine friends accept our quirks, just as we accept theirs. Kids inherently understand this, yet it’s often adults who lose sight of it.
So, despite my earlier fears, my son likely won’t head to college still sucking his thumb, nor will he take his blankie into adulthood (unless, perhaps, it’s part of a box of childhood memorabilia). As experts assert, children will transition away from these habits when they feel ready. They aren’t machines; they are individuals with their own unique timelines for development.
In the end, they grow up—whether we are ready or not. For more insights on parenting and childhood habits, check out this related post on our blog. Also, if you’re exploring home insemination options, you can visit Make a Mom for trusted syringe kits, and for a deeper dive into fertility treatments, consult this excellent resource from ACOG.
Summary:
Thumb-sucking and attachment to comfort objects like blankies are common in children, and experts suggest that most will eventually outgrow these habits without pressure. Parents should focus on providing comfort and understanding rather than shame, allowing children to develop at their own pace.