Hey there, kids! Today, I want to share some life lessons with you — starting with the most crucial one: don’t be a jerk. This encompasses sharing, showing empathy, kindness, and putting in the effort, among other essentials. However, judging by the state of our home, I might have overlooked a key point in this whole “don’t be a jerk” lesson. Here it is: Please, for the love of everything, put your belongings where they belong.
If you’re wondering what I mean, let me break it down for you. All that mess scattered around the house? Believe it or not, there are specific spots for everything. Crazy, right? Here’s a rundown of where things should go:
The Trash Can
I’m getting really tired of digging out crumpled snack wrappers from between the couch cushions. Our living room floor resembles a recycling center for granola bar foil. The plastic wrappers from string cheese — and sometimes half-eaten, moldy string cheese — cover your bedroom floor (where you’re not even allowed to eat, but we’ll save that for another chat). Juice boxes, tape rolls, bits of paper, chewed gum, and random items you bring in from outside? They all belong in that rectangular container in the kitchen, known as “the trash” or “the garbage.”
The Dishwasher
It seems you might think that leaving dirty dishes around magically makes them clean again. Spoiler alert: that magic is called “Mom,” and she’s getting pretty fed up! Seriously, the time I spend gathering up crusty bowls and rogue spoons could be better spent on other things. But don’t worry! We have a machine in our kitchen that cleans your dishes for you, and all you need to do is put them in. Just open the door, pull out the rack, place the dishes inside, and close it. I know you can remember that sequence because I’ve seen you conquer complex video games.
The Hamper
I know you might not appreciate my taste in home decor, but that tall bin in the laundry room and the smaller ones in every bedroom aren’t just there for looks. They serve a purpose! That’s where your dirty clothes should go. I don’t want to find them on the bathroom floor, scattered on the way to the shower, or anywhere besides the designated spot: the clothes hamper.
The Closet
I understand that you may need your shoes at a moment’s notice when a friend comes over and invites you for a bike ride. But it really only takes a few extra moments to grab them from where they belong. Doing so could even save you time in the long run since you often spend precious minutes searching for where you last kicked them off.
The Toy Box
You know how items in a store are organized on shelves? That’s because if everything were just thrown around, it would turn into chaos — similar to your room when you don’t put your toys back in their designated box. You know, the box specifically meant for your toys? Yeah, that’s called the toy box.
The Toilet
Let’s talk about where to dispose of your bodily waste. There’s a hole with water in it — please aim there. And boogers? They do not belong on walls, wiped on your mattress, or anywhere besides tissues, which I ensure we always have on hand.
By refreshing your memory about where everything goes, I hope to achieve a tidier home. Or at least one that doesn’t cause me to lament my lack of a housekeeper. You can help me with this, right? Because let’s not forget — not being a jerk starts with treating your mother with respect.
For additional insights on keeping your home and life organized, check out our post here. And if you’re looking for quality products for your journey, look no further than Make A Mom for at-home insemination kits. Also, if you want to know what to expect during your first IUI, this resource is excellent.
Summary
In summary, kids, it’s time to step up and take responsibility for your belongings. From the trash can to the toy box, each item has a designated spot, and putting them back helps keep our home tidy and enjoyable for everyone. Remember, being considerate to your mother is the first step in becoming a better person.