Is your little one causing a ruckus this holiday season? Are you feeling the judgmental glares from relatives while you attempt to savor a moment of peace (and maybe a glass of wine)? Fear not! I’ve compiled a list of fantastic pre-planned justifications for your children’s less-than-ideal holiday behavior.
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I sincerely apologize for Finn gnawing on your dog’s tail. He’s been on a significant growth spurt lately, which has made him particularly ravenous.
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I’m baffled by why Mia decided to show her private parts to Grandma Edna. She recently learned that girls and boys have different anatomy, and this could simply be her way of expressing her newfound knowledge.
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I’m mortified that you saw Liam licking every deviled egg and returning them to the plate. We’ve been teaching him about weighing options before making final choices, but it seems the lesson got a bit mixed up.
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Please excuse Clara for attempting to share her boogers with your son. We’ve been emphasizing the importance of sharing lately, and it may have gone a tad too far.
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I assure you, Oliver didn’t intend to urinate on the cupcakes. His dad has been helping him practice using public restrooms, and let’s just say, he’s been a bit too focused on his aim.
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I’m not sure what’s gotten into Sophie, who has taken to running around and playfully biting everyone’s behinds. I suspect the babysitter has been letting her binge-watch too much Animal Planet lately.
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No, we don’t condone foul language at home. I think Ethan picked up “Where the heck are my keys?!” from some rough kids at daycare. Those little ones can be quite the influence!
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I promise you, Emma has never used lipstick to draw on the dining room walls before. Her teacher thinks she has a flair for artistry and has been encouraging her creativity. Educators, right?
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I’m just as surprised as you are that Noah gifted your daughter a jar with a fart inside. It’s not like we’ve ever joked about something like that at home—honestly!
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I have no idea why my kids are acting like a chaotic troupe of banshees. It must be all that sugar my mother-in-law sneaks to them when I’m not looking. Definitely a recipe for disaster!
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In summary, the holidays can bring out the wild side in our kids, but we can always find humor in their antics. With a few well-placed excuses and a pinch of understanding, we can navigate these festive gatherings with grace.