Recently, we experienced a power outage right before I had to pick up my kids from school. To get out of the garage, I had to disengage the garage door from the automatic opener manually. When we returned home, with the power restored, I had to reattach the mechanism, which required me to climb onto the back of our vehicle for leverage. As I balanced there, one foot on the car and the other precariously positioned on the garage door, my son asked, “Why don’t you just wait for Dad to come home and do it?”
I calmly replied that I was fully capable of handling it myself and didn’t need to wait for his father to fix things. While that was a concise response, I had a multitude of reasons for wanting to take charge. Now that my kids are older, I don’t have to worry about them getting into trouble while I take on tasks. I genuinely enjoy managing things independently for several reasons.
I Crave Knowledge and Skills
I am a hands-on learner, even if it takes me a while to figure things out. I relish the opportunity to tackle new challenges, especially when it involves getting my hands dirty. It gives me a sense of accomplishment and empowerment. Like the time I renovated an old cabinet or removed a chandelier in front of my kids; in those moments, they thought I was invincible. Honestly, so did I.
Impatience is My Nature
When I need something hung on the wall, want to repaint a room, or have just received a piece of IKEA furniture, I often find myself too impatient to wait for my partner’s assistance. I don’t mind if it takes me a few drinks and half a day; I’m going to get it done. Procrastination gives me anxiety, and I struggle to focus when tasks are left unfinished. Instead of passing that urgency onto my laid-back partner, it’s better for everyone if I just dive in.
Setting a Positive Example for My Kids
I want my children to see me doing as much as their father does. I don’t believe in the notion of “men’s work” versus “women’s work.” If something needs doing and you can do it, you should. Whether it’s fixing a leaking faucet or building a shelf, I want my kids to understand that taking initiative is important. Just as I expect my partner to help out when he sees chores that need to be done.
Understanding My Partner’s Exhaustion
After a long day of hard work, my partner is often too tired to tackle household tasks like unclogging a drain or fixing a door knob. I completely understand, and I don’t want to pressure him when he gets home.
My Passion for Redecorating
I love to redecorate, even though my partner isn’t always on board with my ideas. Sometimes, I manage to complete projects before he gets home, which means he’s often unaware of the chaos that occurred in our living room or bedroom. One time, I struggled for hours trying to paint stripes in the bathroom, ultimately succeeding. He didn’t notice for six months, which felt like a win!
Dealing with Procrastination
My partner tends to take his time with household repairs. He often believes there’s always tomorrow to fix that light bulb or repaint the windowsills. I, on the other hand, don’t have the luxury of that mindset and can become quite irritable when things are left undone.
Preparing for the Unexpected
I didn’t share this with my son that day, but one of the main reasons I take on these tasks myself is rooted in personal experience. I’ve seen someone very close to me lose her husband and felt utterly helpless. She had relied on him for everything around the house and didn’t even know how to unclog a toilet. That scared me, and I refuse to put myself in a similar situation. I want to be self-sufficient and prepared for emergencies.
Keeping My Mind Active
Being a stay-at-home parent has, at times, felt like it has stifled my mental energy. I have no regrets about my choice, but I’ve found that tackling household projects like changing cabinet doors or researching the best way to stain a deck keeps my mind engaged and sharp.
This doesn’t mean we don’t work together or ask for each other’s help. I’ve definitely called him in a panic over a broken sink. I simply want to contribute, learn, and show my kids what their mother can do. I’m unafraid of making mistakes through the learning process, as it teaches them that perseverance can lead to success.
If you found this article insightful, check out another one of our posts on empowering self-sufficiency, which discusses similar themes. And for those considering at-home insemination, Make a Mom offers reliable syringe kits. Additionally, you can visit CDC’s ART page for excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary
Embracing independence in managing household tasks empowers me and sets a strong example for my children. It’s not just about completing chores; it’s about fostering a sense of capability and resilience. By taking initiative, I’m teaching my kids valuable life skills while also ensuring I’m prepared for whatever life throws at me.