It’s nearly 10 p.m., and my eyelids are heavy as I try to correct a typo in my latest article. Suddenly, I hear my daughter’s voice echoing from her room, “Mom! I’m scared! Can you come snuggle with me?” I quickly ask my partner to step in instead. I have a deadline looming for the morning, and I need to focus before my brain turns to mush.
“But I want Mommy!” she wails.
“She’s busy working, sweetheart,” my partner reassures her.
In that moment, my heart twinges. I can’t help but picture my little one years down the line, possibly recounting to a therapist, “My mom was always too busy with work.”
Dramatic? Perhaps. But the guilt that accompanies being a work-from-home mom is very real—a feeling I never anticipated. Since I was a child, I envisioned myself as a stay-at-home mother. I thought I would work for a bit, marry, have kids, and then devote myself entirely to motherhood.
I did work for a while, and then marriage came, but when our first child arrived, we quickly realized that staying home full-time wasn’t an option. So, I launched a small editing business from home, which allowed me to earn some income while keeping my professional skills sharp. Before long, I craved more structured work, leading me to online tutoring. I adjusted my hours around my partner’s schedule, and everything seemed to fall into place.
Fast forward 15 years, and I’ve juggled at least seven work-from-home roles, often simultaneously. For the most part, it’s been fantastic. I get to create my own schedule, be present for my kids during the day, maintain my professional connections, and contribute to our family’s income. I genuinely feel lucky to have found this work-from-home balance.
However, it’s not all smooth sailing. Working from home means my professional life is intertwined with my personal life. There’s no clear distinction between when I’m “on” or “off.” While I appreciate the flexibility, it can also lead to chaos. If I’m not disciplined with my time—which is often a struggle—I find it far too easy to let work and home life blur together. I tend to work in short bursts throughout the day and night, making it feel like I’m constantly on the clock, despite only part-time hours.
I worry my kids perceive this too. I may be home, but I’m often not fully present. They see me working on the computer, but that doesn’t necessarily register as “work” in their minds. They simply understand Mom isn’t always available for them.
And bless their hearts, they certainly don’t make it easy! When I wake up early to work before they’re awake, they somehow manage to rise early too. And when I try to focus after they’ve gone to bed, they often call for me or decide it’s the perfect time for a late-night heart-to-heart.
I can retreat to my office, but you know how it goes—when Mom is in the house, she’s always in demand. I often escape to coffee shops to work, which is a treat, but that’s not an everyday option.
Then there’s the house itself. Keeping young kids entertained without relying too heavily on screens tends to create a bit of a mess. Happy, occupied kids mean I can work uninterrupted, but it also results in more cleaning for me (or, more accurately, for them, though teaching them to clean takes my time and energy). I’m constantly faced with the never-ending piles of laundry, the dishes that seem to multiply, and the dust that needs tending. These household chores tug at me throughout the day. I contribute to the mess even as I feel overwhelmed by it. Work and kids take precedence, which often means the housework gets sidelined—sometimes to the point where it spirals out of control.
Yet, it’s not all doom and gloom. I never miss out on my kids’ activities, and I cherish the time I get to share with them. I’ve had to learn to compartmentalize my time and establish firm boundaries, which has been beneficial. I’ve also worked on shedding the guilt associated with working in front of my kids, although I still grapple with that at times. My partner is incredibly supportive, so in the grand scheme of things, the positives tend to outweigh the challenges.
I wouldn’t trade my work-from-home lifestyle for anything, and I’m immensely thankful for the freedom it provides. However, I urge others to avoid idealizing this scenario too much. Being a work-at-home mom offers a mix of both the best and worst experiences.
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In summary, while being a work-from-home mom offers flexibility and the chance to be present for your children, it also comes with its own set of challenges. Balancing work and family life is a continuous journey that requires discipline and understanding.