It all started off as a typical evening. My partner and I relaxed on the sidelines of our child’s karate practice, indulging in a quick dinner from a nearby drive-thru. I handed a few French fries to our toddler, securely strapped in the stroller, while throwing a thumbs up to our 6-year-old across the room. This is romance in our household on a Monday night.
In a moment of distraction, I reached into my bag to grab my phone. Instead of the usual sleek device, my fingers plunged into a warm, sticky mess. I recoiled in horror, pulling out a greasy box that held the remnants of a half-eaten fried apple pie. These sugary treats are my partner’s guilty indulgence, so why was it hiding in my bag? And how did it end up on my hand?
“Honey, why is this in my bag?” I hissed, giving him a pointed look.
He shrugged nonchalantly. “I didn’t want it in my pockets, so I just tossed it in your bag.”
“Did it ever occur to you to use the trash can?”
Blank stare.
“Ugh. We’ll discuss this later.”
Once home, we had a chat about respecting each other’s space and the importance of trash cans. Then, I decided to empty my bag’s contents onto the kitchen table. Among the usual suspects—his phone, wallet, keys, and lip balm—I found six toy cars, 15 Pokémon cards, a handful of assorted rocks, and yes, a pair of boys’ socks. Yes, socks! I didn’t even bother to smell them; I just assumed they were dirty and tossed them into the washing machine.
This, my fellow parents, is what I refer to as “the family bag”—a dumping ground where everyone’s belongings end up without a second thought, and I’m left to carry the load.
Need sunscreen? Toss it in Mom’s bag! A water bottle? Mom’s bag! Found a mysterious stick that might come in handy later? You guessed it—Mom’s bag!
Clearly, this has spiraled out of control. I can’t help but wonder if this whole scenario hints at deeper issues—perhaps about dependence or blurred boundaries. Nonetheless, my priority is to reclaim my bag for its original purpose and lighten my burden.
Now, when we return home, I zip up my bag and put it away, ensuring no one can sneak in their treasures. I also take out items that somehow find their way back in and encourage my partner to utilize his pockets more. With my 6-year-old, I play a game of “Do you really need that?” before we head out. He may be convinced he needs to take three books to the park, but I know those will inevitably end up in my bag on the way back.
Oh, and I’ve hidden two stylish fanny packs in the back of my closet, perfectly wrapped for them as a surprise. Now they can carry all the half-eaten pies and socks they want—leaving my bag and me mess-free.
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To read more about family dynamics and reclaiming your space, take a look at this blog post.
In summary, it’s time to reclaim our bags from the family chaos and establish some boundaries, ensuring we remain organized and stress-free.
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