We often think of social media as a curated gallery of our lives, and perhaps that’s the best way to describe it. While it’s not entirely fabricated, there’s definitely a glossy filter over our day-to-day experiences.
Lately, my mornings have been a blur of groggy coffee sips around 7 a.m. as I wake my three little ones for another school day. Within a few minutes of settling at the kitchen table with my laptop, I find myself scrolling through Facebook.
“What’s going on in your life today?” it prompts me. Well, thanks for asking, Facebook! I usually end up sharing an uplifting quote I found on Pinterest, a snapshot from our latest family outing, or expressing my excitement for the upcoming arrival of baby Lewis. And of course, there’s the obligatory selfie — I save that for about once a week, just to remind my friends and family what I look like!
The new “memories” feature is often a delightful trip down memory lane, and I find myself sharing an old photo of the kids, marveling at how quickly they’re growing. I’ll typically caption it with something like, “They’re just perfect!” and throw in my go-to hashtag #grateful.
A couple of days ago, I had an idea and logged out of Facebook to see my profile through a stranger’s eyes. Wow! I thought, what a picture-perfect family! Seriously, in every post, we look so vibrant and undeniably happy.
I don’t consciously aim to deceive anyone with my posts. I simply tend to shy away from negativity, so I focus on sharing the bright spots. But here’s the thing: there’s a lot more happening beneath the surface than what you see as you scroll through your feed, coffee in hand, likely comparing your own life to the enchanting snapshots of others.
I can’t shake the thought of how my Facebook profile might appear to outsiders, and I feel compelled to share the truth.
For instance, that selfie I shared was taken three weeks ago, on a rare night where I actually got some solid sleep — my eyes were not puffy then. Now that I’m in my third trimester, sleep is a distant memory; I’m lucky to get a couple of hours without being jolted awake by a baby kick or swirling thoughts about the impending delivery. Not to mention my stomach growling at 4 a.m. after six hours since my last snack.
Currently, I’m still in the pajamas I’ve worn for three nights, my hair is a greasy mess, and morning sickness has returned with a vengeance. I just lost my cool with the kids for opening yet another cereal box while three others sit half-eaten. And as I type, I have a browser tab open googling “what’s normal vaginal discharge during pregnancy.” I was so exhausted this morning, I nearly typed that into my Facebook status instead! Another tab is my checking account, which I glance at with a heavy sigh, knowing I need to buy groceries, pay for school pictures, sign the kids up for sports, and maybe even squeeze in that “babymoon” trip before the baby arrives—yet funds are always tight.
But you won’t see any of this on my profile because it doesn’t fit the image of the optimistic, health-conscious, all-knowing mom I try to project.
I’m pretty sure the milk I used in my coffee this morning was past its expiration date. And that beach photo I shared last week? It was the only shot where everyone wasn’t making a goofy face or fighting over who gets to stand where. Not to mention my husband and I were bickering over whether or not we should have ordered pizza the previous night. But hey, let’s all smile, right?
As I said, it’s not all a façade. I genuinely love my family and think we’re pretty darn great. I appreciate the chance to share moments with relatives who live far away and hope to spread a little positivity amid the overwhelming news we face daily.
It’s crucial to remember that social media is simply real life, but with a filter. The unglamorous moments and struggles are often wiped away, showcasing only the highlights from everyone’s lives. So, while you’re scrolling through your feed, don’t forget: we all have our struggles, our puffy eyes, and our own secret Google searches (admit it!). We may not all react the same way when checking our bank balances, but we all have our “stuff.”
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In summary, remember that what you see on Facebook is often just the surface. Behind every perfect picture is a reality filled with challenges and imperfections. So, embrace your own journey, and don’t let those filtered highlights cloud your self-worth.
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