In my mind, I still feel like I’m in my mid-20s—maybe 27 at most. So, when I recently asked my teenage daughters to huddle closer for a picture, it struck me just how close they are to that youthful stage of life. It was a jarring reminder that, biologically speaking, I’m well past the 40 mark.
That younger version of me didn’t drink coffee.
But this version? I’ve finally succumbed to the coffee craze—just this year, in fact. The countless late nights spent up before dawn had begun to wear me down, leaving me with a mood that could only be described as cranky. Now, with the help of a few cups of coffee, I find I can direct my energy into more constructive snark.
That earlier me maintained a pristine home.
Everything was meticulously organized; nothing was ever out of place. Thankfully, having kids helped me shed that particular obsession. I’ve learned to embrace a little chaos. Sure, my home may resemble a series of unfinished projects—like baskets of neatly folded laundry next to a tower of unmatched socks—but I’ve found a way to make it work. Every few months, I bribe my kids with the promise of a binge-watching session if they sort those socks while we enjoy a show. For a few glorious days, my socks actually match!
That version of me was never without makeup.
My makeup routine used to be almost artistic—complete with sleek eyeliner, perfectly lined lips, and a flawless finish. Since becoming a mother of three, however, my hormones have taken on a life of their own. I’ve learned the hard way that eye makeup is a risky venture when I’m likely to tear up over any number of online stories. Plus, ditching the makeup saves me a solid 20 minutes each morning, allowing for a bit more much-needed sleep.
That younger self had a plethora of male friends.
I used to marvel at how easily I got along with my guy friends—no drama, just camaraderie. But now, I cherish my book club nights with my female friends. It’s a chance to come together, share a bottle of wine, and lean on each other during tough times. Emotional moments are no longer something to fear, especially since I’m not wearing makeup anymore.
So, while my teenagers have their whole lives ahead of them, they also have the daunting task of figuring out their identities, navigating friendships, learning to love themselves, and realizing that women can be allies rather than rivals.
Maybe life after 40 isn’t so bad after all. I may have coffee (often), clean socks (sometimes), supportive friends, and the occasional glass of wine. This version of me doesn’t think that sounds too shabby at all.
For more insights into parenting and self-discovery, check out this post on Life After 40. If you’re exploring home insemination options, consider visiting Make A Mom for their trusted at-home insemination syringe kits. Additionally, Hopkins Medicine provides valuable resources for pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary:
Reflecting on the evolution of self, this piece explores the changes that come with age and motherhood. From embracing coffee to accepting a little chaos in the home, the author shares the joys and challenges of life after 40, emphasizing the importance of female friendships and self-acceptance.
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