As the week approaches for us to send our 18-year-old son off to college, I find myself surrounded by a mountain of “Don’t Forget!” essentials piling up by the door. This serves as a poignant reminder that I have a limited time to wrap up a few last-minute parental duties before I release him into the vast unknown we call adulthood.
1. After we settle your tuition, you’ll have more cash than we do.
I’m relieved we had our “money talk” today. When you asked about your financial situation while attending school and I explained it, your expression suggested a bit of shock. Just to clarify, we’re covering your tuition, textbooks, living expenses, and a generous meal plan that could fuel an army. I’m not sure what else you believe you’ll need, but those graduation checks that came flooding in last May? They weren’t just for show. You’ve got a healthy bank balance—far more than I do. So, please, don’t be shy about using it.
When you mentioned that you didn’t want to spend your hard-earned cash on necessities like shampoo, I couldn’t help but see your father in you. He’s notorious for collecting those tiny hotel shampoo bottles on his business trips. Do you have any work trips planned? No? Then just buy yourself some shampoo, would you? And when your Grandmothers inquire about how you spent your graduation money, telling them “bubbles” won’t be a total lie.
2. Anyone can do laundry.
People have warned me for years that I’ve been doing you a disservice by handling your laundry, but I didn’t mind helping while you excelled in sports and academics. When friends expressed concern about your laundry skills before leaving for college, I reassured them that I could teach anyone to do laundry in five minutes flat. And yes, I’m not calling you a moron here—I’m your mother, after all.
As expected, we tackled that chore today without a hitch. You did well! I’m sorry your clothes came out a little wrinkled and that you’re fretting about ironing. When I suggested smaller loads to avoid wrinkles, your response—“that would take too long”—stung a bit. Did you realize that was a personal jab at my entire purpose? I live in laundry!
And just so you know, there’s no such thing as “free time.” Any fool can see that. Oops, I might have just called you a fool.
3. I will always be your parent.
Never think that my parenting days are over. Just last night, you were out late at a friend’s house. When I texted to check in before bed, your response felt a tad nonchalant. I know that in just a week you’ll be on your own, and I won’t have the luxury of knowing your whereabouts, but I plan to stay involved right up to the last second—up the dorm stairs, down the hall, and right into your room.
And spoiler alert: when you come home for Thanksgiving and Christmas, I’ll pick up right where I left off. If that doesn’t sit well with you, maybe you should schedule a business trip during those holidays. You could always grab some shampoo while you’re away. Just a suggestion—of course, I won’t tell you what to do. Oh wait, scratch that—I absolutely will.
As you embark on this new chapter, remember that navigating the world is part of the journey, and you’re not alone. If you’re interested in understanding more about the intricacies of life and decisions like home insemination, check out this informative post here. And for those considering options to boost fertility, visit Make a Mom to explore their range of at-home insemination syringe kits. If you’re curious about what to expect with your first IUI, this excellent resource here might be helpful.
In summary, as you prepare for this exciting and challenging new phase, remember that you’re equipped with the skills and knowledge to thrive. I’ll always be here, ready to support you—whether that means helping with laundry, guiding you through financial choices, or just being your parent.
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