When I was expecting, I envisioned those initial moments of motherhood filled with blissful experiences. I imagined a smooth delivery, serene nursing sessions, and quickly bouncing back to my pre-baby body. However, motherhood is anything but predictable. It’s messy, chaotic, and often filled with choices that may not align with popular opinion. Here are several decisions from my first year that I refuse to apologize for—and neither should you.
1. Opting for a C-Section
The misconception that C-sections are an easy way out is rampant, but let me share my story. I was desperate for a C-section as my baby was stubbornly Frank breech. His positioning caused me unbearable pain, and despite my pleas, I was told to wait until my scheduled surgery at 39 weeks. When my water broke at 38 weeks, relief washed over me, but I had no idea what lay ahead. Yes, I had a C-section, but it was anything but easy. The surgical room was not glamorous, and I was subjected to all the realities of surgery while my arms were restrained. My scar is a reminder of the journey, but I wouldn’t change a thing about how my son entered the world.
2. Choosing Formula Feeding
Breastfeeding is often glorified, but what about those of us who turn to formula? I firmly believe that fed is best. I faced medical issues that left me unable to produce milk, yet no one prepared me for that reality. The guilt I felt about switching to formula was overwhelming, but ultimately, it was the best decision for our family. My husband participated in feedings, allowing us to bond as a family. Our son is thriving, and I stand by my choice to formula-feed without regret.
3. Letting Baby Cry It Out
At just 13 days old, we transitioned our son to his own crib, establishing a routine that worked wonders for us. Following the “Moms On Call” method, our baby learned to self-soothe, allowing him to sleep through the night by 10 weeks. It might not be for everyone, but this approach has worked for us, and I’m proud of our decision.
4. Dadding It Up During Bath Time
From day one, my husband took charge of bath time and bedtime. I requested this because I knew he needed that bonding experience with our son. When my husband is home, he prioritizes this time, allowing me to catch up on chores or just breathe. The time they spend together is invaluable, and frankly, it’s a win-win for everyone involved.
5. Traveling Without Our Baby
Having a child can shift the dynamics of a marriage, and sometimes, a little time apart is necessary to reconnect. Leaving our son with loving grandparents to enjoy a getaway has been refreshing for our relationship. Each time we travel without him, we remind ourselves why we chose to be together in the first place. It’s all about balance, and we’re committed to nurturing our relationship while ensuring our son feels loved and secure.
I stand firm in my choices. Each of these experiences has contributed to our family’s happiness and health. Why should I apologize for that?
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In summary, motherhood is a personal journey filled with unique challenges and choices. It’s essential to embrace your own path without guilt. Remember, you’re not alone in this, and there’s no need for apologies.
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